School’s Out

I don’t know how many of you know this, but Alice Cooper (yes, that Alice Cooper) and Randy Johnson are co-owners of a sports/rock eatery in Phoenix, AZ, called–what else–Alice Cooperstown.

Now, I really like Alice Cooper. I thoroughly enjoy his syndicated radio show. And I knew who Randy Johnson was before I found out about this joint. So, this isn’t some bizarre personal vendetta. It’s simply that the menu for their eatery is horrific in its use of punctuation (or nonuse, as the case may be). I won’t even go into the cases where the incorrect usage results in misspellings to boot. I’ll let you good people see for yourselves.

Click here to visit the homepage, from where it’s only another click to the menus.

I especially want to point out the children’s menu, or “Kid’s Menu” as it says. Apparently only one kid gets to eat. However, the three main sections aren’t even possessive: “Kid Drinks,” “Kid Foods,” and “Kid Dessert.” Why? Got me. I’d have used the possessive, or if I was trying to be clever (or something) I’d have said “Kid Menu” so it all matched. Also, there’s the misplaced apostrophe attempting to turn “soda” into a plural.

At least they got the “whipped cream” right. If it said “whip cream” I might have to hurt someone.

I should also warn you about the (in my opinion) excessive use of Exocet. Consider this a public service announcement. A little Exocet goes a long, long way, and there’s a LOT of it on these menus. Protect yourselves.